Im the fat one.
I swear last week I was totally cute and pregnant. This week we did our maternity photos .... and there was a seacow in between Allen and Devon.
At first I was puzzled. Why is that manatee on land, and why is it in my photos? Then, the reality set in. Sometime in between last week and this one I have gone from totally cute and knocked to the up to mad cow incubating sea monster. I really thought I had until 34 weeks before I started to resemble the marshmallow man, but apparently ..... Im advanced.
So, Ive learned a few things this week. A) dont wear white in your maternity photos, as it never works out well B) the mirror in my bathroom is a GOSH DAMN LIAR, and C) anyone who says that pregnancy is beautiful is apparently into bestiality.
With sea cows.