Since I A) Have a whole lot of free time and B) they wont pay me to facebook (which is super lame because Im really good at it!) I’ve decided to chronicle all the ways I transform into the trophy wife the good Lord intended me to be.
That is, if trophy wives are intended to wear Motherhood Maternity (instead of Alexander McQueen) and do all the work themselves (instead of a nanny, cook, and a gardener). But I digress.
The first order of business is actually feeding my poor husband something that DOESNT originate from a box, or come from the frozen food section. Im not a terrible cook, but lots of work + lots of morning (and noon, and night .... ) sickness have made it a fend for yourself situation around the Cone household. I figured that the man has foraged for sticks and berries long enough.
So Im going on a kick that I like to call the Dumbass Gourmet. That pretty much means that Im going to start cooking shit that isnt hard, that the husband thinks I am awesome for, and that doesnt cost me hundreds of dollars. Also, I wont be using things like quail eggs, I wont be combining ginger avocado duck asshole confit. I have no idea what confit is either - I just read it in a book. Ill be making real folks food.
Yesterday I made a pretty run of the mill chicken and rice. Its hard to fuck that up, so thats what I started with. It came out nice, no one died, and no one lost their ass on the toilet later that night. Ergo, a success.
Today I decided to branch out a little, though I must say that I did marry a VERY meat n’ taters sort of man. We could have steak and starch every night of every week and hed be happy as a pig in shit. Unfortunately for him, the rest of us require some sort of variety. I started with something that was easy for him to understand, yet with enough twist to keep me happy.
I made pastry shell mini pot pies. They actually turned out fantastic, and youd never believe how easy or cheap they were.
I took the mini puff pastry shells (sold in 8 packs) and set them on a cookie sheet.
Beat 4 medium eggs together. Distribute evenly through the pastry shells (just a little is fine).
Combine a can of mixed veggies - drained, a can of sliced white potatoes - drained(I chopped them up into smaller bits), 3 oz of shredded cheese and about 5 oz of cooked diced ham. (I know it sounds gross, but bear with me).
Then add 1/2 t. of mustard powder. Combine all that shit up into a big fat nasty mix. Then distribute into the pastry shells. Just dump it right on top of the egg.
I then added just a touch of shredded cheese onto each little pie for shits and giggles.
I put it in for about 30 minutes at 400 degrees. The important part is that the egg is done.
So it was like a quiche pot pie. CLASSY.
Then for a side I cut up mangos and peaches and tossed them together (Emril watch out!).
The final product was:
Actually very delicious. I know it sounds strange, but they were surprisingly fantastic.